The topic
for today is Marriage.
No
wait... Lemme be more specific.... Indian Traditional Marriage.
What does
Indian Traditional Marriage mean?
To me Marriage is an institution that lawfully unites a man and a woman who wish to spend the rest of their lives together as husband and wife.
But no...
That is Not what Indian Traditional Marriages mean!
An Indian
Traditional Marriage (ITM) consists of not only the man and the woman, but also
the man's family (parents, grandparents and relatives), religion, beliefs, habits
and traditions. Phew! Well most ITMs are such...
Now, have
you noticed how much importance is given to the man's stuff? It's the Man's
family that the Woman has to adopt, the Man's religion and beliefs the Woman
should follow and the Man's traditions the Woman should carry on.... I wonder
why!
Before
marriage the boy and the girl are two different individuals who plan to share
their lives together. Mind the word "share", not own another's life.
So after marriage why is the woman expected to adopt the Man's family and it's
religion n stuff? The Man doesn't own her life, nor her mind and heart!
Have you
heard of a man converting his religion to the one that of the woman's? Have you
heard of a Veg man turning into Non-veg coz the woman is so?
I haven't
heard any of the above for sure.... Specially not the veg and non-veg part.
C'mon, these are an individual's personal choices, and should be respected!
In that case...
Why is a woman forced to give up non-veg just coz
her in-laws are veg?
Why is a woman asked to start following the religion and traditions
that her in-laws follow?
How can an individual be expected to suddenly change all her
beliefs and faith just because she loved and married the man?
Why aren't her personal choices respected and allowed to just be
the way she wants them to be?
This applies to both men and women. Why should anyone be expected to transform according to their in-laws' needs?
Do any of you have a logical answer to my questions?
"Love me for who I am, Not for who you expect me to be." -Priyam Datta
I know of men who have converted to follow the woman's religion. I also know of a whole non-vegetarian family who gave up cooking non-veg at home because they got a vegetarian bahu. There are expectations from everyone. It is an individual's choice whether to live up to them. The question to ask here is why an individual (male or female) would want to live up to other peoples expectations and why some people believe that their expectations HAVE to be lived up to. I healthy dose of self esteem, I believe, would do the trick!
ReplyDeleteI agree with you completely..... The question here is not only for women or men... its for anyone.... why should anyone be expected to transform or compromise? Hmmm.... I feel empathy towards each other would also help....
DeleteSome are old schooled and some are open minded...Some are flexible enough to change their mindsets while others face rigidity and so on....it is difficult to find all of the same kind!
ReplyDelete